TBT: Forgotten memories

My Dad is the father of six girls and no boys. Yes, yes, get it all out of your systems now - poor him, right? Poor him my foot! He has had such a good life and give us all a couple decades and he is going to be the most well-taken-care-of cranky old man. Even he admits that!

I will admit, however, that with six daughters, everything hasn't been always been rainbows and sunshine. Six daughters, six young women going through puberty (some at roughly the same time. Shudder). Six daughters, six emotional first dates. Six daughters, six wardrobes to fight over. You get the idea.

Six daughters, six birthdays to forget...

When I was about 8, I had a father/daughter party at church. We ate food, we played games, it was fun for all. To be honest, I probably wouldn't remember much about that particular party it weren't for one game we played. It was one of those games where you ask one half of a pair questions about the other half and see how many they get right. The dads were supposed to be answering questions about the daughters and they threw in a couple of what I thought were slow pitches. What color are your daughters eyes? What is your daughter's birthday?

My dad had five kids at that point. That's a lot of birthdays to remember! Our family isn't known for our good memories. He was asked what my birthday was. He answered October 8. My birthday is October 9.

THE HORROR.

I think I have been holding it against him for twenty years, despite the fact that I still to this day have to double check with my sisters that I remember the right date for his birthday every year. But, like the patient man that he is, he has let me hold my little grudge and give him grief for it whenever I get the chance.

That is what I remember that event for. I remember that my dad forgot what day my birthday is. Then the other day I was going through a packet of loose pictures that my mom had stuck in the back of one of my photo albums. For the first time in years I found a couple pictures from that father/daughter party and I remembered something else about it:

Did I mention that my dad is a wonderfully patient man? Six daughters, a lifetime of submitting himself to events that asked him to do things like be wrapped up as a toilet paper mummy, much to the delight of those six daughters.

I forgot all about that part of the party and I am sure there were so many more moments that were so much better than the moment when he forgot what day my birthday is. Especially when, twenty years later, I find myself in love with and married to a man who also can't always remember what day my birthday is on.

I stuck the toilet-paper-mummy picture up on my bulletin board after I found it the other day, just to remind myself that my past isn't all forgotten birthday memories. There are many, many more toilet-paper-mummy memories out there, ready to be remembered and enjoyed.

Pumpkin Month: A Love Story (or, 11 Fantastic Pumpkin Recipes)

When Jill and I were roommates in Bloomington, Indiana, we discovered a mutual love of pumpkin recipes (and holiday food in general - we had a truly epic Thanksgiving while we lived together as well) and with our roommate Ann, we declared October to be pumpkin month, and started to make every delicious pumpkin recipe we could find - pumpkin shakes, pumpkin pastries, pumpkin rolls, pumpkin cookies, dinner in a pumpkin, plus some butternut squash soup that we snuck in on a technicality. (If you don't believe me, here is the blog post I wrote halfway through the month, and there were more pumpkin and Halloween festivities before the end. Also, I had totally forgotten about Brewster's ice cream in Indiana, but now my mouth is watering for that pumpkin pecan ice cream. Mmm.) It was the most delicious, beta-kerotene filled month of my life, and every year I strive to recreate it with mixed results that are never quite as wonderful as the original.

However, over the years that means we've collected some pretty darn amazing pumpkin recipes, and we're going to share a few of our favorites with you here.

I (Meg) have about a million pumpkin recipes pinned on pinterest, some of which I've made and some I'm saving for later, but I've made all of these listed here and recommend them highly. Yum.

Perfect Pumpkin Roll, from Mel's Kitchen Cafe. I love this recipe because it's kind of fancy and exciting to make (I'm always just a little bit terrified that the whole thing is going to break into a million pieces, but I've made it many times now with uniformly excellent results) but it's not so difficult that you have to carve out more than about an hour for it. In fact, as I type this, I have the cake part of one cooling in my fridge. It's incredibly delicious and so pretty. (I have also made this pumpkin roll from Ina Garten, which is excellent but needs some fancier ingredients that take a little more tracking down, and it tastes a little fancier too, so consider your audience when you pick.)

Everything Good in a Pumpkin from Dorie Greenspan. My sister-in-law recommended this recipe to me a few years ago, and she makes it for Thanksgiving every year. It's really exciting to cook right inside a pumpkin, and the results are quite delicious. I recommend making sure you're using a pumpkin pie pumpkin (the littlish round ones, I think also sometimes called sugar pumpkins) because a big jack o' lantern pumpkin just drowns out the deliciousness inside. (I speak from experience. When I lived in south Texas, I couldn't find anything but ordinary pumpkins, and it was okay but not amazing.)

Dr. Dean's Pumpkin Bars. When I was in college, I had this wonderful professor who brought these amazing treats for our midterms and finals, because she was an amazing human being. They are so good, super easy, and the recipe makes a TON. If you need something to take to a big party, this is your recipe. I posted it on my blog years ago (without pictures - it was a pre pinterest world) but it's a wonderful moist pumpkin cake topped with the creamiest cream cheese frosting imaginable. Trust me.

Cream Cheese Pumpkin Bread. This is the most delicious pumpkin bread EVER. I made it for a friend last year and she asked for the recipe and made it about 6 more times while the pumpkin was out. Truly, it is quite something, and it's easy and yummy.

Roasted Butternut Squash Pasta with Pumpkin Sauce (about halfway down the page in the post from that link). This is a quintessentially fall meal. It's warm and filling and squashy and herby. I love it. It makes a LOAD, so make it for lots of people, plan on lots of leftovers, or cut it.

Double Chocolate Pumpkin Cake (or cupcakes) from Picky Palate. Moist, delicious, subtle, and full-on chocolatey goodness. The cake itself doesn't really taste like pumpkin, and the pumpkin butter cream is incredibly subtle and lovely. It's a good recipe for those among you who are not pumpkin fanatics but want to be seasonal anyway. I've made it as cupcakes more than once, and they are divine.

  * * * * *

As for me, Jill, one of the biggest discoveries that I made during that inaugural Pumpkin Month was that pumpkin was meant for more than dessert dishes. Savory pumpkin?! What the what?!

Needless to say, I was skeptical. Ann won me over, however, with her Dinner in a Pumpkin (which I have since adopted as my own yearly October tradition) and I haven't looked back since.

Pumpkin, Apple and Cranberry Bake. Okay, so the recipe is technically for butternut squash, but the month of October just makes me do crazy things like swap pumpkin in the place of other squash. This is a delightful side dish with either type of squash in it, although with both butter and brown sugar making an appearance, its place of being served with dinner instead of after it for dessert is debatable.

Penne with Creamy Pumpkin Sauce. This one uses canned pumpkin, so if you're not in the mood to hack into a whole pumpkin (and scoop out its innards. Shudder), this is the recipe for you. Add chicken and you've got yourself an amazing fall meal.

Pumpkin Soup. This recipe combines my two fall favorites- pumpkin and soup. This particular soup has just enough richness to fill you up and who can deny the need for something hot and creamy on a crisp fall day?

Pumpkin Ricotta Ravioli. Okay, confession: I haven't actually made this recipe yet. I want to so badly, though, but I have never made my own pasta and I am more than a little intimidated. As soon as I muster my courage (and buy a ravioli press), this recipe will be the first fresh pasta I try. If any of you have the skills, try it out for me and let me know how it goes!

And to end on a sweet note, these Chocolate Pumpkin Turnovers were part of our very first Pumpkin Month all those years ago and I love them still today. They are the perfect balance between the chocolate and the pumpkin and as an extra bonus, they are super easy to make! So go forth and bake!

How To Be Lifelong Friends Based On Childhood Awkwardness

Megan: When I was four years old, I really, really wanted a friend who was a girl. I had four older brothers and a neighbor friend who was a boy, and I was just really sick of playing ninja turtles and GI Joe. It so happened that the house across the street was for sale, and I started praying with all of my little four-year-old heart that a little girl my age would move into that house. In what was the first miracle of my life, when a family did move in, they had a little blonde girl just my age, and we immediately decided, in the way that children do, to be best friends. And then, for some reason, we decided that this meant we should dress in matching clothes a LOT.

Melissa: Megan and I were fairly different as personalities went. I was a wild soul, my mom used to say my spirit was too big for my body. Megan proved to be a calming factor in my life, she balanced me out pretty well, and I probably did the same. She was the youngest child, with four older brothers in a family who was pretty established. My parents were relative newlyweds with three very young children.

Megan: Because my brothers were between 8 and 14 years older than me, it was like I was an only child sometimes - except that my wonderful brothers were all teenagers who occasionally got a little impatient with a couple of little girls bugging them. I think once we accidentally killed my brother's lizard, and another time a different brother tied Melissa up with duct tape and hung her upside down because she was being annoying (which she thought was hilarious until the duct tape ripped all of her arm hair off - then she went home crying to her mom.)

Melissa: Megan and I were quite the pair. We recall frequently one of our not so finer moments when we dug up a giant hole in her parents lawn to make alligator soup. We also tried to invent mosquito repellent using sugar and water. Not sure why that didn't work. My mom loves to tell the story of when Megan’s mom Judy called her up to congratulate her on becoming pregnant with my sister. My mom hadn't told a soul she was pregnant, she was only a few weeks along, but Megan and I had noticed she was acting weird. The only possible explanation was that she was going to have a baby, so I marched over with Megan to Bert and Judy’s to ask if they would mind taking me trick or treating that year since my mom would probably have a newborn by then. She did have a newborn, and they did take me trick or treating.

Doing "The Monster Mash" in ballet class

Megan: I don't remember that Halloween, but I do remember Melissa's mom showing us her pregnant belly (as the youngest child in my family I'm pretty sure this was my first close encounter with pregnancy). I had my first bee sting in Melissa's back yard (I think I was trying to get rid of it and I caught it with my hand, which I probably couldn't do again if I tried.) I'm also pretty sure that the alligator soup was some kind of witch potion that we were going to feed to (imagined) unsuspecting children.

We just "happened" to dress alike.

Melissa: Not only did we share an affinity for hideous fashion, (okay, that was our mothers) we also bonded over tree climbing, trampoline jumping, make believing, and common toys. We went through phases that basically started with Mattel and ended with American Girl dolls.

Megan: Plus we were always acting out anything we could think of. I remember using my blankets to play Batman and Robin (on the trampoline, of course, so we could fly), making up our own story lines for the characters in all Disney movies (Melissa was a really good sport about being the male characters more than her share), Power Rangers, Ninja Turtles, Star Wars, and I'm pretty sure there was a phase when we were Fairy Princess Kitties, because we couldn't decide what we wanted to play.

What's funny about pictures of us from this time is that they start out pretty cute. I mean, when we met, we were four. But then our teeth fell out and grew back in all big, we both got awful 90s glasses and had ridiculous bangs, we started wearing jeans with zippers that were like 18 inches long. The years between about 8 and 15 are just rough, people.

Melissa:I'd like to emphasize the fact that we lived right across from each other, in a very small cul de sac. We were constantly running back and forth. In those days, the biggest problems in our lives were whose house we would meet and what we would play. I don't recall many instances where we would call and make arrangements to play, rather we seemed to be such an important part of each others lives that we were constant fixtures at one another's homes.

Megan: When we were 9, Melissa's family moved to another city. We were devastated. I remember sitting on my mom's lap for what felt like hours, holding my favorite doll and bawling.

Melissa: Moving was the most devastating thing that ever happened to me. It still brings tears to my

27 year old eyes, remembering the day I drove away from Megan. I sobbed the whole 45 minute drive

away from Bountiful. Even at 9 years old, I knew things would never be the same. Our parents were

always good to let us make long distance phone calls, and make the drive from Bountiful to Pleasant View (or vice versa) in order for us to continue to have our stylish and coordinated sleepovers. Over the next two or three years, the phone calls became less frequent, sleep overs were few and far between, I think there was a letter or two in there somewhere, but as we grew up we grew apart.

We were trying to be really cool.

Megan: We kept in touch, but eventually, we had our own lives and our own friends and just didn't make the time to see each other as often. I think we had a double date with our high school boyfriends to watch Psycho, and then I just didn't see her again until her bridal shower.

Melissa: Enter Facebook, and blogs. Of course we had to add each other. You can’t spend the

ugliest years of your life with someone who loves you and not be eternally endeared to them. We

reconnected. Melissa Marsden became Melissa Turney, Megan was there with her parents. Megan Winegar became Megan Long, unfortunately I was out of state, but my parents were there. We have been able to continue to watch each other’s lives, and once again, we've become good friends, thanks to facebook and texting. Recently, Megan and her family were driving through Las Vegas and stayed with us over night. Once again, we found ourselves having a sleep over. We stayed up for longer than we probably should have, laughing ourselves silly with our daughters and husbands close by.

Megan: I think one of my favorite parts of this whole story is that somehow, we have ended up with a lot of the same interests. We watch the same TV shows, we recommend books to each other because we tend to like the same ones. We realized the other day that we inadvertently bought the same car seat for our daughters. I find her family completely delightful, as does my husband, who got a taste of playing zombie dollhouse with Melissa's oldest daughter. Putting my baby to sleep in Melissa's baby's crib gave me a tiny glimpse of the life we imagined as little girls, where we would live next door to each other and have daughters who would be best friends.

Melissa: This summer, my daughter will turn four years old. I can’t help but wondering if she will find a Megan. I hope so. I pray for it. Having Megan was one of the greatest blessings of my life. Even though we never lived close to each other again, and we are adults, we can still be found on occasion, chatting via texting or facebook laughing ourselves silly to jokes that would only be funny to us.

Megan: Because really, when you have this many ridiculous pictures together, you just have to stay friends forever. You can't risk the blackmail.

Have you ever had a best friend? We want to hear about it! Share with us in the comments!

Follow us on Instagram @becominglovelyblog to see the awkward photos that didn't make the post - and then share your awkward childhood photos with us! #tbt #awkwardandlovely

Best Imitation of Myself

Sometimes I wonder about how other people see me. I feel like there are so many different versions of me out there in the world just floating around. There is shy, independent, baby sister me; emotional high school me; funny, stressed, happy college me; me on a Friday night or me on a Monday morning; me with my friends and family and me at work. All of those versions (and so many others) make up the whole, but sometimes it bothers me that most people will only ever see one version of me.

There will be people who only interact with me once or twice and maybe I'll be having a terrible, no good day and they'll see and remember that not so lovely version of me. There will be people that, regardless of how much time and effort we both make, will never experience a version of me that works for them (and vice versa). There will also be those select few who will get a chance to see the whole package...and they will still love me, even when dealing with crazy, over-bearing control freak me.

I think that, in the end, people will see what they want to see. All I can do is remember that everyone is dealing with their own doubts, moods, fears, troubles, etc. and try to be the best version of myself regardless of those things.

Family

Sometimes my family drives me crazy. That's a pretty normal thing, I'm sure. On the other hand, most of my happiest memories involve a family member.

Take a minute to think about some of your happy memories. Do you ever realize how happy you are in the moment? It is so easy to not notice moments like that because they are so normal and simple and common, but those can be some of the best memories. You could just be sitting around the table after dinner talking and laughing and remembering silly stuff or lounging around on a perfect Sunday afternoon...even a trip to the store can become memorable.

I took a friend to do some sight seeing this weekend and we stayed the night with my grandparents. My aunt (my mom's only sister) was also visiting so we got to hang out with her as well. It was so fun to watch and listen to my Grandad as he was telling stories about me to my friend - stories that I don't even remember all the details to and stories about things that were just between him and me. It was fun to listen to my Grandad and my aunt mention things about my mother that I didn't really realize we had in common (neither of us can make fudge). There are stories and memories and experiences that can only come from family...usually they are the most embarrassing*/funny/sad/touching ones in your life and, when I take the time to think about that, I am so grateful for my family.

All of those experiences and connections are what help to make me a lovely person. They keep me happy and humble and grounded. And the best part is, family is unlimited...the term can be all encompassing if you want it to be. Your family can include your immediate family members, cousins, close friends or even your aunt's neighbor's dog. It's a great thing. So don't discount the lazy days and shopping trips and boring Wednesday nights. There's always an opportunity to create a happy memory.



*I was going to include a photo of my family, but they are all pretty much in the embarrassing category, so we're skipping that part for now.

Guest Post: Happy Moments

Krissie is yet another former roommate of ours. I have known her since she was a frightened 11 year old moving into a new place and have shared so many happy times with her that I can't remember them all. She and her new husband, Barry, live in Woods Cross, Utah where they work and play and do all those wonderfully sappy things newlyweds do. Krissie sent us this post as a reply to our "Happiness is..." posts and I wanted to share it with the rest of you.

I guess the thing that I will post is what has made me the happiest recently. I can't send in the thousand images that make me smile or feel all warm and fuzzy inside, but I can send the one that makes me the happiest right now.

I remember pieces of wedding planning and things I thought were important. I dreamed of a wedding that was elaborate and beautiful. A church filled with family and friends. I remember sitting in my boyfriend's car one night and asking him what kind of wedding he wished for. All he could manage to say was one that made me his wife.

When our wedding day arrived, I sat on the steps at Temple Square in Salt Lake City with my husband and all my family, new and old, and I felt like I could glow with all the happiness that I felt inside (kind of like Yvaine from Stardust. How interesting would it be if people actually did glow when they were in love? A lot more ladies would be a lot less single, that is for sure). Aside from the happiness I felt in that moment, I remembered all the moments that led up to being there, with him, and how, for the first time, I felt just fine to be me. The girl that loved him.

Obviously, there are many things that make me happy. But I am a believer in moments that culminate to one perfectly happy moment. I know that everyone says that getting married was the best day of their lives. And, you know, that is true for most people. Not necessarily
because they married the man of their dreams (although that is a huge factor), but because for one moment they are sure of themselves and of who they are. And for the rest of your life, you go back to that moment in your head when you knew that you were everything you ever wanted to be and that was, finally, more than enough.

So, these things make me happy. A bright warm afternoon with me looking fantastic and feeling even better. A man who is better then anything I could dream of because he is real and I got to pick him for myself. All of my siblings gathered around me looking like little versions of my parents, laughing and joking and smiling. A life that finally made me feel like I had done everything right. And this moment:

An Idea

I had an idea last night. I think it's pretty cool.

I was talking to Mike and I started thinking about how when people talk about the happiest day of their lives, it's usually the day they got married or the day their first child was born or something. And then I thought, you know, there are a lot of other days that are just amazing even if no significant events are happening. I know I've had days where I just feel so happy I could burst, and I think they qualify. But the thing is, I know I've had more days like that than the few I can remember, and it's a shame that I can't remember those others.

So my idea, then, was this: What if I had a journal where I wrote about any day that I thought might end up being one of those days? It could be my Happiest Day of My Life journal, and just be full of entries about times where I felt really fantastic. I feel like that might be kind of a nice thing to look back on when I'm older.

So what do you think? Is it something you would do?

Happy Moments

I was browsing my blogs and came across this lovely post from Abbey Goes Design Scouting. It refers to this essay from Cooks Illustrated* called The Bliss List. The author makes a list of happiest moments.

I love this idea, especially on those down days. What better way to get a lift than to think back to your happiest moments? So here are a few of mine.

• Christmas at my grandparents' house growing up. Everyone was there. Every couch, cot and bed was full. There was always a fire in the fireplace. There were three Christmas trees decorated for the holiday and a wreath on the front door filled with Tootsie Roll Pops.

• I spent a summer living with my sister in northern Virginia in a tiny basement apartment. There was one room (I slept on the couch) and half a kitchen. It was awesome. One night in particular, my mom met us for dinner then came back to the apartment with us. She ended up staying the night (she slept on the arm chair) because we got drawn into a viewing of You've Got Mail. Nothing exciting happened, but it was just the three of us and I always love when it's just the three of us. Also, my mom started indirectly quoting The Godfather, which is amazing.

• The wedding of my two friends, Jamie and Mike. The day was beautiful, we ate Subway and played Pictionary between the ceremony and the reception, and we danced till they kicked us out of the reception hall.

• Becoming an aunt. Times six.

• Playing Charades with Corynn. Her velociraptor impression makes me laugh just thinking about it.

• Oddly enough, hanging out in a hammock on a porch by the water during someone else's vacation. I was there to nanny but I had an allergic reaction so I couldn't take the kids to the beach. While they were gone, I had free time. I spent all of it reading in that hammock and it was divine. Heaven on earth.

There are a few of my happiest memories. What are yours?



*For those who might have trouble with our links: http://www.cooksillustrated.com/byissue/default.asp?doctypeid=12&selDate=153 and http://gogoabigail.com/blog/2010/01/19/daily-dose-of-green-29/