Thursday, February 11, 2010

Magical Friends

So I was in a class the other day, and somehow the subject of friends came up. We were talking about what makes someone a good friend and what qualities we love in our friends, and then the teacher said, "And then you know how every once in awhile you get those magical friends who stick with you through everything and know everything about you and still love you? I love those friends."

And I was thinking about it, and I really have some magical friends - old friends with whom I communicate constantly via Skype, facebook, email, regular mail, blogs, etc. even though we now live hundreds of miles away from each other; friends with whom I don't communicate as often, but who feel as comfortable as always when we do talk; new friends with whom I can start projects and take road trips and make Thanksgiving dinner.

I don't know what the magic ingredient is for these special friendships, but I do know that part of it is the willingness on the part of both people to be friends. It's hard to force your friendship on someone, and it's hard for someone to be friends with you if you don't hold up your end of things. It takes work to stay best friends years after you've moved to different states, but sometimes you just both know that this is a friendship that is going to be worth it.

I'm wondering if one way to build these friendships is to meet people as if they could be these magical friends. Yes, shared experience, common interests and compatible personalities can play into this, but I can't even tell you how many people I've met who seemed so different from me, but who ended up being very important to me. (It's like Anne of Green Gables says: “Kindred Spirits are not so scarce as I used to think. Its splendid to find out there are so many of them in the world.”)


Lin said...

I have yet to be successful in using positive affirmation to create the conditions needed for "magical friendships," but that doesn't mean it isn't possible.

Magical friends always sneak up on me. A lot of my favorite friends came at a time in my life when everything else (for all intents and purposes) sucked...big time. But I love that spark. That seemingly instantaneous understanding that you sincerely care for a person and that you were meant to be friends always.

I'm a giant sap, but I know none of you care. And I know some of you will laugh out loud when I say, "I've always thought of us as sisters...Let's make a pact."

Erin said...

Ha! That picture is more than magical, it's magically spectacular. I too think of the friendships from London and other experiences as magical. Even though it's rare that I get to see you, what with you living in Indiana, I still think of you as my friend. We've been to concerts together and had meaningful conversations. Heck, we lived together.

I see some of my magical friends all the time. But, I am glad I have some that live far away. It makes me more grateful for them.